Our homeschooling journey began with our daughter, Samantha. She struggled with separation anxiety from as early as I can remember. Dropping her off at school was a nightmare, as she would cling to me and cry. Needless to say, after the teacher had peeled me off her, I would leave briskly so I could cry in the car and wait for the teacher to message me to let me know when Samantha had calmed down. This went on for a good two years until she eventually settled, although not completely happy.

We took the first step in investigating what homeschooling would look like when Samantha mentioned she would rather do school at home. She was now in Grade 3. I explored many options and spoke to as many people as I could to get opinions and advice. Coming from a family of teachers, it was not easy to talk about homeschooling, so we left it at that.

By the time Samantha was in Grade 5, she was dancing 6 days a week, about 18 hours total. She was deeply committed to ballet, and it left her with little of a life. She would wake up at 6 am and go to school. I would fetch her with a ready-to-go packed lunch so that she could change and eat in the car on the way to ballet. I’d drop her off, then collect her again after 6 pm (sometimes 8 pm) to come home, eat supper, and start homework. Samantha would go to bed around 9 or 10 pm, struggle to fall asleep, and the whole routine would start again the next day.

The Final Push To Journey To Homeschooling

After a year of research, my husband and I agreed that homeschooling would be a better fit for Samantha, so she could have a life and enjoy her dancing without feeling stressed by all the schoolwork, and we could actually see her more!

We enrolled at a particular online school, and in January 2020, Samantha started Grade 8 online. We
could see the pressure and stress lift off her; she was much happier and less stressed. It hasn’t been without hiccups, but I am definitely happier that Samantha is working online now, as her schooling hasn’t been interrupted during this unsettling pandemic.

Homeschooling Became A Family Decision

In 2020, our eldest son, Nathan, who was in Grade 10 at the time, was frustrated with the school system and the disruption caused by COVID. He loves learning but was bored at school by the repetition and the interruptions from classmates. How should I keep his curiosity alive? In primary school, I gave the teachers extension work they could give him when he had completed his work, but unfortunately, it wasn’t used. In July 2020, Nathan decided to join his sister at the same online school, so in January 2021, he started Grade 11 online.

He is also a lot less stressed by the pressures of school. The timing of his transition was also perfect, as unbeknownst to us at the time, we would be transferred from Cape Town to Johannesburg in March 2021, which would have been very unsettling, and changing schools would have been very stressful. Nathan does not cope with change very well, but having switched to online school before moving definitely helped him manage the move to another province.

Our Journey To Homeschooling Our Youngest Child

Our youngest son, Levi, had an unfortunate start to school. He was eager to start school because his cousin was at school and she loved it! He started at a play school in January 2019 when he was 3 years old. He was so brave on the first day. No tears for Levi or for Mommy! Day 2 was good, but on day 3, the wheels came off. Levi would cry the night before, saying he didn’t want to go to school the next morning.

Putting him to sleep was incredibly difficult; getting him up and going to school was a fight. The teachers kept telling me it was normal, that it would get better soon, and that I just needed to give it time. Day after day, it only got worse. Levi’s anxiety rocketed, and he turned into the most terrible child I have ever seen in my life!

He would come home and hit and kick his siblings. The tantrums turned into unending meltdowns. He would scream and shout most of the time. It was a nightmare in our house. There were about 25 children in each class, with one teacher and maybe an assistant. Levi would walk around with his hands over his ears, trying to get all the crying children to stop crying.

What Were We To Do?

Something was telling me that this was way more than separation anxiety. I had experienced separation anxiety with Samantha, and this was totally different. After 3 weeks, we took Levi out of school,l and I worked very hard to calm him and get my little boy back. This process took a good 6 weeks. We decided we weren’t going to go through that again, and he would stay home with me while I educated and socialised him.

A couple of months later, Levi was desperate to return to school, so after much prayer and many discussions, we enrolled him at a different play school in October 2019, with only 6 children in the class. He was very happy there and loved the teacher and her assistant. Levi made friends and took part in most of the activities. He even joined the Christmas concert at the end of the year.

After the December holidays, Levi moved up to the next class with a new teacher. He attached himself to this teacher very quickly. Unfortunately, in March, the country was put into a hard lockdown, and schools were closed. Knowing that Levi wasn’t very comfortable with change and the fact that he still struggled with anxiety, we decided to keep him home and not send him back to school. (It was just as well, as he would’ve been in and out of school for the rest of the year, and it would’ve been very unsettling and stressful for him.)

In October 2021, we heard we were moving to Jo-burg. Levi’s anxiety grew, and I noticed other unusual traits. I took him to a play therapist and an OT specialist. He also had an assessment with a Pediatric Neurologist. The results are inconclusive, and we have yet to get a proper diagnosis. Since moving to Jo-burg in April 2021, Levi has been much happier, though the anxiety remains. Because of this and COVID-19, we have decided to keep him at home until we have more definitive answers and can make a decision that suits him. I love teaching Levi at home and watching him grow in confidence, and he loves the one-on-one attention.

My conclusion is that I probably should’ve started our homeschooling journey much earlier. Still, I am also grateful for the experiences my children had, because I might not have known where they needed help if they hadn’t been through those difficult, challenging times.

Did you enjoy Journey To Homeschooling by Joni-Lynn Goch?

Why not pop over to my HOMESCHOOL tab and read a few other stories written by moms who have decided to homeschool their children?

Joni-lynn Goch is a dedicated wife and mother of two teens and a preschooler. She is the “Mary Poppins” of mothers. Joni-Lynn exudes calm, joy and peace. One could call her the baby whisperer of the 21st century.

She has been a day care mother for many years, putting new moms at ease as they return to the working world, leaving their babies in her loving arms.

She is a talented singer and is married to her teenage love, Justin. Who lovingly indulges her obsession with Scrabble.

 

 

If you would like to share your journey to homeschooling, please email me at onemessymama4@gmail.com